The Kiss of Death

- By Shamar Starks, Erotic Shop Sex and Relationship Coach / Counselor

Shamar Starks, Erotic Shop Sex and Relationship Coach / CounselorHave you ever had a crush, desire, or serious thang for someone only to have them kiss you and be totally turned off?  Kissing is an art.  All of us have the right tools to create a master piece (lips, tongue, teeth) but some of us really don’t know how to use them.  What makes a kiss so bad that you never speak to the person again?  Let’s take a look at a few examples.

I asked some of my male and female friends the question; what is the worst kiss you ever experienced?

Here are the results.

The Windmill Kiss

The girl kissed him moving her tongue in a fast circular motion.  It was weird and a definite turn off.   The budding relationship ended after the kiss.

The Zombie Kiss

This guy is particularly romantic so this was something he will never forget as the most creepy and strange thing about this girl’s kissing style.  She always kept her eyes open.  The relationship progressed but he never could get over her keeping her eyes open.  He’s still weirded out about it now.  Needless to say the relationship didn’t last and wasn’t successful.

The Dog Hump Kiss

When he kissed her he made his tongue as thick as he could and stuck it in and out of her mouth fast and strait.  It reminded her of the way dogs look when they hump someone’s leg.  Nothing developed out of the date with him even though he was nice, sexy, and had it going on.  The kiss turned her completely off.

The Dead Fish Kiss

The girl opened her mouth very wide covering his lips with hers (he has big beautiful lips).  Then she stuck her tongue in his mouth as far as she could and didn’t move it, ever, at all.  The budding relationship ended after the kiss.  He’s sure of it because he doesn’t remember her face.  Just the horrible kiss…

Last but not least.  The Mushy Sticky Icky Kiss

She was digging him every way possible.  They shared so much in common, poetry, fashion, business, political interests, they talked for hours on the phone, he had style, class, money a good job and a business qualities she admired in a man.  When they progressed to the kissing stage (she loved the way his big lips looked and was excited to feel them on hers) it was a huge disappointment.  The big lips she admired where mushy and too soft, she could feel his teeth through the lips, it was like his lips had disappeared, all she could feel was teeth and wetness AND his mouth was sticky inside and out!  Yuck!  She really liked him so she wanted to work with him.  She suggested he drink some water, tried different angles, told him to just let her kiss him and nothing she tried worked.  She had planned to spend the night and have sex with him, but instead she made up an excuse, left his house, and never talked to him again.

In my opinion kissing is one of the most important love play activities that lead to intimacy.   What do you think?  Ladies would you have stuck it out with the guy that had everything you liked in a man and got over the horrible kissing or would you have worked with him until you guys got it right?  Fellas, do you still try to “hit it” and just stop kissing the Dead Fish kisser completely?  I would like to hear your thoughts.  What was the worse kiss you’ve ever experienced?  Was the relationship successful or was it the ultimate turn off?

Look for part 2 of this post.  We’ll discuss techniques that will help you be a great kisser.  To name a few; Start off slowly, Communicate the way you like to be kissed, Be coachable!  Be aware of the saliva in your mouth is it sticky? Does it smell good? how can you tell?  More tips in The Kiss of Life coming soon…


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